http://www.amazon.com/Herpes-Other-Problems-Crystal-Smith-Connelly-ebook/dp/B00KNDYRXA/
I'm doing a Kindle Countdown Deal on Goat Herpes and Other Problems, so it's on sale for 99¢ for the next few days. I hope you'll check it out...I'd love to make you laugh! : )
http://www.amazon.com/Herpes-Other-Problems-Crystal-Smith-Connelly-ebook/dp/B00KNDYRXA/
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I'm doing a Goodreads giveaway for Goat Herpes and Other Problems, so if you want to read a book about Greek gods in group therapy, go enter to win! : )
https://www.goodreads.com/giveaway/show/101368-goat-herpes-and-other-problems I'm doing a Kindle Countdown Deal for Goat Herpes and Other Problems, so it will be on sale for 99 cents on June 29th and 30th, then $1.99 on July 1st and 2nd. Here's the link:
http://www.amazon.com/Herpes-Other-Problems-Crystal-Smith-Connelly-ebook/dp/B00KNDYRXA/ And here's the description: It's Willow's first day on the job at Godly Acres, the world's premier rehabilitation facility for gods and goddesses, and she might be in over her head. Sex addiction, alcoholism, eating disorders, goat herpes...you name it, there's a Greek god who has it. Will she be able to help these gods and goddesses work through their issues? Find out in Goat Herpes and Other Problems! (Goat Herpes and Other Problems contains the plays "Godly Acres," "Godly Acres: Bitch Session," and "Playing Doctor.") If you get it, I hope you like it...it's the best book you'll ever read that has "goat herpes" in the title. ; ) Name: Medusa
Occupation: Gorgon, accidental killer Favorite book: 100 Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence Favorite movie: The Elephant Man…I can relate. Favorite TV show: Anything that’s funny…I need comedy in my life. Favorite song: All By Myself Favorite animal: Anything but snakes If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Lifetime made a movie about me, and I was played by Tori Spelling. What would the title of that movie be? It was called Give Me Back My Head, Give Me Back My Dignity: The Medusa Story. Hobbies: Writing poetry, accidentally turning men into stone, keeping potential murderers out of my lair Motto: “Athena is the worst.” Name: Aphrodite
Occupation: Most beautiful woman in the universe Favorite book: I’m too pretty to read. Favorite movie: Home movies of myself Favorite TV show: I don’t watch TV…there are too many uggos on it. Favorite song: “You Are So Beautiful” Favorite animal: Peacock If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? Supermodel Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Myself…no one else is pretty enough. What would the title of that movie be? So Pretty It Hurts Hobbies: Looking at myself in the mirror, talking about how beautiful I am Motto: “Inner beauty is overrated. No one can see it, so it’s like it isn’t even real.” Name: Athena
Occupation: Goddess of wisdom and war, trivia champion Favorite book: The encyclopedia Favorite movie: Quiz Show Favorite TV show: Jeopardy Favorite song: Like a Virgin Favorite animal: Owl If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? The host of Jeopardy…watch your back, Trebek! Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Jodie Foster…she seems smart. What would the title of that movie be? Smarter Than You Hobbies: Reading, challenging people to trivia contests, avoiding men Motto: “If you’re alone with a man, he will rape you.” Name: Hera
Occupation: Goddess of marriage Favorite book: Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus Favorite movie: When Harry Met Sally…I wish I could’ve married my best friend instead of my brother. Favorite TV show: Marriage Boot Camp…my marriage seems great in comparison. Favorite song: Cold-Hearted (Paula Abdul must’ve met Zeus at some point because this song is totally about him.) Favorite animal: Not cuckoos…Zeus ruined those for me forever. If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? Divorced Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Charlize Theron…she looks like she should be playing the queen of the gods. What would the title of that movie be? I Deserve Better Hobbies: Punishing Zeus’ lovers and bastard children Motto: “Keep it in your toga, Zeus!” Name: Hermes
Occupation: God of commerce and wealth; messenger of the gods Favorite book: Steal This Book (Don’t’ mind if I do…) Favorite movie: Oceans 11 Favorite TV show: Pawn Stars Favorite song: “I Believe I Can Fly” Favorite animal: Doves-their wings make my shoes fly. If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? International jewel thief Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Neil Patrick Harris What would the title of that movie be? Klepto!: The Musical Hobbies: Stealing, traveling in my winged sandals Motto: “What’s yours is mine.” Name: Ares
Occupation: God of war Favorite book: The Art of War Favorite movie: Apocalypse Now Favorite TV show: I don’t own a TV…I have a tendency to throw them when I’m mad. Favorite song: “Saturday Night’s Alright For Fighting” Favorite animal: I hate animals…they’re too happy. If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? UFC Fighter Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Lou Ferrigno What would the title of that movie be? Ares Mad! Hobbies: Fighting, starting wars, seething Motto: “I hate everyone.” Name: Cronus
Occupation: Retired Favorite book: To Serve Man (baby edition) Favorite movie: Cannibal! The Musical Favorite TV show: The Brady Bunch…six kids who didn’t try to overthrow their father Favorite song: “Eat It” Favorite animal: Chickens…they taste just like my kids. If you weren’t in your current profession, what would you be? The ruler of the universe : ( Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life? Anthony Hopkins What would the title of that movie be? Maybe We Should’ve Gone With Abortion Hobbies: Resenting my six asshole kids Motto: “Kids will ruin your life.” |
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